Friday 23 March 2012

Random post at three in the morning

It is ridiculous how much emotion is pouring out of me these last few days. Ever since the cruise I've started writing songs again, I've started to learn the keyboard, I've started to sing again.. I have to ask myself.. Why? I feel as though every ounce of my being is somehow tied with a muse, dancing across my mind.. It's really hard to explain. Even now, I have so many ideas running through my head, it's just..  I'm so tired, I'm exhausted, but I just want to go practise my keyboarding.

For me, the one handed girl, the girl who lost her right hand to paralysing, to pick up an instrument.. After all of that... Everything I've been through.. I just don't even really think most people understand it's a huge step for me. When I was young, I was heavily involved with music, singing, dance, gymnastics.. When I suffered my brain tumour, I became a bystander because of many things, lack of mobility, lack of time.. lack of acceptance by peers.. I though music was done for me.

But this year, music is huge in my life. Watching it, playing it, singing it. It makes me want to cry. Cry tears of joy, because ultimately, music is where I know I belong.. I know that I will never make a career out of it, (Let's be realistic.. Who wants a singer in a wheelchair who's fat?, or a one handed keyboardist?) but just being in it and doing it is enough for me for now.  I'm incredibly thankful that whatever Deity has decided to step in and grace me with their presence again. Although it can be very frustrating at times, it's worth every ounce of that frustration.. It soothes the inner beast. I'd like to think I'm Belle, but I'm really just a beast.

So it is with that, that I'm going to share with you a song I wrote literally on the plane home after getting off the cruise.

"Above the clouds, the freedom roams where no one can know,
Can you hear me, sweet song bird of eternity?
Can you hear my calls or primal lust, fading into elegant dust.
Can you cast a glance at my life for me, sweet song bird of eternity?
You mean so much more than you know, forever child, eternal laughter, innocence redeemed.
The clouds wisping through the sky,freedom not known to man and oceans roaring below.
Forever child, eternal laughter, innocence redeemed."

Tuesday 20 March 2012

Alright guys.

So, I've realized over the last few days that I'm not going to be able to continue this blog with just posts about shows I've been to and metal things, because I frankly, just don't get out to enough shows and I'd ideally love to be posting every day, or every other day at the very least. So I'm going to expand this blog a bit.

My thoughts, travel, reviews on albums.. New things that catch my eye will be on my blog from now on. I'm also going to buy a new microphone soon, so I'll likely post a few of my covers of my singing on here. It'll still be about shows, and I'll still review when I get the chance, but for right now there's nothing really interesting going on in my life show wise, so boring posts it is! I should have some reviews up soon and I might even start with Imaginaerum. Who knows. ;) Thanks for your patience guys.

Bailey Dawn.

Saturday 10 March 2012

Booking tickets for people in wheelchairs.

I'm not going to really focus on this blog post much, because it's fairly negative but I need to share this. I feel it's an integral part of this entire wheelchair+concert business that shows the darker side of not even being at the concert yet and facing problems.


Today, me and Daniel and some friends went to West Edmonton Mall. I was going to pick up some theory books for my keyboard (fuck yes instruments! :3) and we were going to pick up tickets for the Transiberian Orchestra. I've never seen them live, it's apparently pretty fucking rad. Classical music mixed with metal, with lasers? I'm in. So the day goes by without incident, and I get my theory books.

I'm in a relatively good mood, surrounded by friends, musical instruments. So then we get to Ticketmaster.

Every single fucking time I deal with Ticketmaster, they dick me around! It takes needlessly longer than needed to get my tickets to events. They end up not having the system either through over the phone and have to transfer me eighteen billion times or we go into a guest services directly and they end up taking 30 minutes to complete it.We've booked numerous events through out the years, (HIM, Avenged Sevenfold, Sonata Artica, Great Big Sea, Dane Cook, Kathy Griffin..) and it's all been the same! Every fucking time.. Normally I would just start buying directly from the venues but that's not the way it works because Ticketmaster has the monopoly and then they'll double book the accessible seat and blah.. That's never fun. They even go so far as to do it for our shitty little baseball team (I happen to love baseball) and so I just fucking book through them.

Anyways, we get to Ticketmaster, and not surprisingly.. we waited.. for an hour! Finally, I left the line up.. Daniel was still waiting while the women was on the phone trying to get an answer out of head office. At the hour and a half mark, the woman hung up her phone and told us we had to go to the venue and purchase the tickets directly through them, because she couldn't help us.. Because I was in a wheelchair. What would and SHOULD have taken ten minutes took an hour and a half.

So now, we have two options, bus to the Jubilee which is fucking FAR away from us and purchase the tickets there (with no assurance of them actually having them, they actually couldn't even tell us if they did or not..) or just not go. Thanks Ticketmaster.

It's things like this that make me feel like I'm just a huge burden and that I'm getting in the way all the time. When there's stairs instead of an elevator, or I have to wait outside a store that people want to go in and I get kind of upset inside. Or even when people have to be inconvenienced BECAUSE of me.

Some times I think it would just be so much simpler if I just stayed at home and just stopped going places.

Sunday 4 March 2012

Guardians of Power, Pearl Reckless, Viathyn and Samandriel

Well, what was there to say? This show was going to be fucking awesome.. I felt good. My body was co-operating with me.. I looked fantastic and stuff like that. We went out for Dan's birthday dinner first and then it was off to The Pawnshop in a cab we went to see Viathyn and Samandriel and the other awesome bands.

This was my make up at the beginning of the band, when I was.. sober.. and awesomer hah



We got there, and Dan and John had to hike my wheelchair up the 20 steps that led up to it, so Yves helped me up the stairs, just making sure I didn't fall on my face. I wore my thigh high boots, which while they look fucking fantastic are uber slippery on the bottom.. Whooops! >.> So.. We get there and have a few drinks. I'm intent on sitting front row though, so I take my spot, and Jacob comes up, along with Marlo!  I'm so happy to see them. It's seriously been far too fucking long! We talk for a bit, and Marlo insists she's not "this" type of metal head. Aha! We know, but I love you anyway! <3 Anyways.

Guardians of Power is on, not my thing, but I'm digging their music. Whatever. Pearl Reckless is on next, and to be honest, I actually really REALLY enjoyed it, and I didn't think I was going to, either. hah. People try to start some shit in the crowd, but this is why I brought like, six people so that they could protect me.. and for the most part it worked.

Viathyn is up next, and well. They are just fucking awesome. Have I mentioned this? Dan and I met Jacob and his crew on the boat, and he gave us a CD (and subsequently ended up doing a shot of JD with Daniel) and I immediately uploaded it to my phone when I got home.. I've been listening to it like non stop for weeks now, it's pretty fucking stellar. In the middle of the set Jacob starts announcing birthdays and he starts tossing t-shirts and then he says. "And you get one just for being here!" and tosses one at me. I was like, "Yes!" Bwahahaha. Also, his vocalist tossed one to my friend Echo, which  was awesome. Thanks guys! It literally means the world to me, you know? I don't expect anything from going to metal shows, but it's always such a nice surprise to see people actually care or notice me. It's really nice of you.

By Samandriel, I had started to develop a huge headache, but I would not/could not/there was no way in hell I was leaving! Samandriel was fucking amazing and so were the other bands so fuck you headache, you take a back seat to metal!

Also, what is it with Symphonic metal bands..? Who made the rule that if you play keyboard for a symphonic metal band you have to be drop dead fucking gorgeous? I would really REALLY like to know this.

There were a few times during Samandriel that I thought I was going to have to move, namely this big tall guy was invading my personal space despite the fact there was plenty of room to stand where he wasn't elbowing me in the face, and then he moved away, and there was this girl inbetween us and he tried to start.. something by shoving her.. This happened about 5 times, and everytime she would go flying into my chair, she would apologize. She finally turned around and pushed him so hard and told him to fuck off. I'm glad it didn't escalate any further than that, because most people were 100% respectful.

After the show, more hugs from Marlo, more chatting with Jacob and then we left, with promises of karaoke when we celebrate Dan's birthday in Calgary.

This was me at the end of the night, a lot more sweaty, tired and a lot less sober. <3

PS. I totally jacked Viathyn's setlist when it fell off stage. Shhh..


P.P.S- The guys from Viathyn reside here: www.viathyn.com You should totally check them out because not only are they fucking awesome, but they are super guys too!

Bailey Dawn

Friday 2 March 2012

70,000 Tons, Thursday through Friday Morning. Last Night and Final day.

I had been fighting a cold all through out Wednesday, but thursday morning I woke up feeling like utter death, and my ears finally gave up the ghost after my abuse to them at the Nightwish concert and being right by the speakers. (I wouldn't take back a single second, it was worth it.) So I got up feeling like I was going to die. After lunch at Johnny Rocket's, and then we went to Alestorm, where unfortunately they didn't get to lift me on pooldeck and I forgot my sunscreen. I took my pirate hat, and I basically got sunburnt to shit. Alestorm was fantastic. <3 Pictures below.





Then off I went to the casino to hang out at the bar and put on my headphones (because my ears weren't abused enough) and listen to some music. I don't know what it is about casinos.. They've always fascinated me, I love the lights, I love the energy, and I love the going ons happening around me. Generally, I'm just a big kid. I see something shiny and I'm like "OHH I wanna hang out there!"

Now for those of you who don't know, I really don't drink, like.. ever. So I'm sitting there with my coke minding my own business when the entirety of Nightwish walks in and sits behind me at the Blackjack table. They keep looking at me.. and so I'm like, maybe I'll start drinking! Four double daquiris later.. I spill one on my shoes. NOT BECAUSE I'M drunk. (I may have.. or may not have been drunk... shhh.) But the bar table is quite high and I'm in my chair, and there's like a lip at the end of the bar so I spill it and the bartender cuts me off. LOL. and asks me where my husband is..

Anyways, the Nightwish boys leave as I'm drinking my now virgin daquiri and Dan comes and he's like, "Come see Eluveitie with me!" so I do and I'm walkin into the chorus line and there they are. OMFG could I get any creepier? Situational irony, that's what this is called.

The only place for me to go is right in front of the speakers, so I decide, what the fuck. I stay for about half an hour and then me and Dan leave and go back to the casino to have a D'jarm black and a drink and there he is.. Finally my chance?

I've been pussy footing around this all cruise... In the mean time, I'm trying to make myself not nervous, I see Marco and figure, he was nice to me! Even though my anxiety is seriously pushing me through the roof and wanting to just.. get out of my chair and run.. I figure I better conquer it and just deal with the consequences later.

So I'm like, "HEY. Picture?!" And poor Marco.. I don't think he knew how to pose with someone in a wheelchair. Honestly, most people just lean. I would have appreciated even that, but he was a trooper. I have no idea how to approach people about posing for pictures with me in the chair either, so don't worry about offending me. You aren't going to. lol.


And then we see Jukka at the bar and I'm like, "Jukka, can I get your signature, because I didn't at the meet and greet!" and He's like "Yeah!" and I'm like, "Can I get a picture too?" Smiles really innocently. ^__^



The time has come for me to drive up to Tuomas, and I just can't.. I can't do it.. So dan tells me to grow a vagina.. and I start to feel really upset because I'm letting my irrational fears in the way, and hey, I thought I had been doing so good all cruise..  Dan (who is amazing and awesome and great and sainted) goes up to him while I'm waiting in the lobby of the casino and they are taking awhile. I start to think it's because he said no, and I put the gift back. Turns out, it was just a huge photo opportunity for Dan.

So Cute, I maintain this has to be my favorite picture ever.


Anyways, I'm facing the other way and when I turn around there's Tuomas and Daniel and I'm like, "Hey... So.. I know this is really imprompt and you're busy so I won't take too much of your time but I uh, just wanted to apologize for nearly mowing you down on pool deck, and getting my husband to go get you, I'm just really shy." and I nodded and he looked at me and kind of grinned and said, "Don't worry about it." and I said, "Can I maybe get a picture?" So we posed for a picture together and I said, "I have a gift for you." and he said, "A gift, why?" and I said, "It's a late birthday present, but you don't have to open it now." Tuomas laughed and said, "But I want to open it now, I love presents." So he opens the organza bag and glances at the pendant and I say. "It's a Beauty And The Beast pendant.." and Tuomas says to me. "It's extroadinairy.. What's your name?" 

"Bailey.." "Hailey?" "Bailey.. Like the irish cream.." "Oh Bailey!" and then he gives me a hug, and a kiss on the cheek! WHATTTTTT! Holy bejesus! I think I died. "There's a letter in there too, it's very lame, and I wrote it for you, but eh.." I say and Tuomas shakes his head, "Don't say that, I use to say that about stuff I wrote too, but it's not the truth."



Then he starts asking me about the cruise.. and I ask for another hug and we part ways.

Mission accomplished, and it only took me five days to do it.

All in all, great fucking cruise! I met so many rad people!

Oh, and the next morning, guess who I saw in port as we were leaving?!



 

Total girl crush on Anette Olzon, by the way! <3 She is spectacularly amazing.

Can't wait for next year!



Thursday 1 March 2012

70,000 Tuesday through Wednesday

Tuesday we slept in, I know we missed some concerts, but Dan was really sick and I preferred a nice long shower, throwing my hair up, I just managed to fall out our state room door in time to get to the merchandise room for the Nightwish Meet and Greet. There were so many people there, and honestly, I was like, "Let's just not.." and Dan was like, "Get in that damn line, now." and he gave me the stern face look. He knows me, he knows I avoid crowds, he knows I would do anything I could to avoid Mr. Holopainen and the rest of the band if I could have. So resolved to my fate, I got in the line. We got into a conversation with these young guys from Trinidad, who are now on my facebook. They were awesome, actually. We waited an hour and a half and the security was lying to the band, apparently they had been there for a few hours and they kept telling their manager 15 more minutes, 15 more minutes.. That really bothered me, but at the time I had no clue. I finally get to Marco Hietala, and let me just be honest here.. He use to scare the fuck out of me. lol. So he signs my pirate book and he's like, "Were you at the show last night?" and I'm like, "Yup!" and I smile at him and then say, "You know, to be honest, you use to scare the hell out of me." So he says, "Oh really?" and he jumps at me and screams. I didn't get scared, because I saw it coming a mile away, but about three girls behind me jumped and screamed. lol

I moved on to Anette and we discussed make up and she was so nice. Instant brownie points, I fell even more in love with her than I already was. Not only is she an amazing singer, but she's an amazing woman, and she's just the sweetest woman I've ever met. She made me feel so comfortable and it was very nice of her, she also commented on my pen, which said "I need coffee" and she was like, "Oh don't we all" and she giggled and handed my book to Tuomas. now.. I didn't expect anything fancy here... All I expected was a smile, a "hello".. *sigh* But all I got was *looks over, signs book* "Here you go ma'am.." and looks away. I was really REALLY heartbroken that I didn't even say two words and that he didn't even say three words. I looked down. But because of the way the line was moving, I couldn't move. Emppu took my book and signed it, but Jukka never did get to that day, and then I have Tuomas STANDING up to sign things over me. Oh fuck yes, I'm making people stand now.

So I decide to get out of line to wait for Jukka, and then.. Everyone crowds the line, and then takes over, making it damn near impossible for me to get Jukka's autograph so I drive out tearing up.  Oh well, at least I got autographs, I suppose? Meanwhile, after M&G the merch line is EMPTY so we get all our merchandise and Dan bought me a Nightwish hoodie. (That cheered me up a little!)

I'm pretty sure we went to nap, because crowds and waiting in line for two hours for me is like death and I had a killer headache so after, Therion's set happened, only I didn't go because I wanted to be in line for Alestorm's Meet and Greet nice and early after that fiasco! So I grabbed my pirate hat and hung out with the cool security dude! GUESS WHAT THE FUCK DAN WAS DOING WHILE I HUNG OUT WITH ALESTORM?!


 FUCK YOU, DAN. FUCK YOU WITH A RUSTY SPORK!

Anyways, that was the fruit of his night! Guess what mine was?!





Alright, so.. We leave the show, and go back to the room, and it's coldish so I decide to throw on my Nightwish hoodie and my wolf hat, as depicted in the picture with the suitcases.. As I'm crossing over pool deck I'm watching people's feet so I don't run them over looking absolutely fucking ridiculous I'm sure, in my wolf hat and my hoodie in +20 weather...(I GET COLD EASILY, OKAY?!) and these feet stop in front of me and my eyes automatically go up and it's him! It's Tuomas Holopainen and my face goes into retard mode, I'm sure, and he just looks at me like "I think this girl is mentally retarded, don't get too close." Dan's like, "Do you want me to go get him? You can give him the gift right now!?" So I nod and Dan approaches him and is like, "Hey, you know, the girl in the wheel chair is a fan of yours and it would mean a lot if you would talk to her." and Tuomas grins and is like, "Yeah, I'm here til Friday.. I just need to catch up with my friend right now.." Still, there's this look in his eye, and he looks back to me as if he's unsure as if to walk away or to go up to  me right now. Dan says, "Go catch up with your friend, but if you see us around, just say hi." And he smiles and says, "Will do!" and walks off.

Wednesday was uneventful, honestly. We didn't get off the ship. We stayed on, and slept mostly, we did hit up Johnny Rocket's and I called this woman's hat dorky in a really loud voice.. Who turned out to be Tuomas.. Hah..  I'm so smooth. And then we relaxed and Dan got some cool pictures of the Caymen Island's.


 And then we went to the room and dicked around most of the day... We ended up ultimately getting ready for Nightwish's second show which was on pool deck. Dan had cleared it with Rami(Security) earlier that day that they would be able to lift my wheelchair up on stage so I was happy that I could be there early and hopefully get front row.

At this point, I was feeling pretty creepy,  because it seemed everywhere I was, Tuomas was. And the way it worked out was we always seemed to be looking at one another and I could never get up the courage to speak with him. I had thought about throwing his gift overboard more than a few times, actually. Dan had gotten me sick so my ears were fucking KILLING me but for Nightwish..? Eh, I'd deal.. I had been to a few shows, and had to leave at the point because it seemed that the only handicapped friendly place was near the speakers and my ears were so bad I just couldn't handle that. (Stratovarius, Kamelot, Therion. etc etc)

We go up about 30 minutes to show time, and they can't find Rami, or the guy they put in charge.. So they can't get me on the pool deck. I'm extremely upset..  I'm crying, while staring at the ocean. Finally the guy returns from dinner, 3 minutes until show time, but by now people have flooded the stage so I'm like there's no point, I'm not going to be able to see anything anyway.. The security gets me up there and moves EVERYONE. I get the spot right directly in front of the keyboards. Oh joy, I look like a giant stalker, I should have borrowed the "Creepinside" pin from Rob. The spot this time was way moreawesome to watch from and I found myself enjoying the show a lot more.



After the show, I was hanging out up top watching Children of Bodom in my wolf hat, and Tuomas ran in front of  me and I was like "Hey-" and then he ran down the stairs. sigh.

So we went to have a drink in the casino and then went to bed.


ONE DAY LEFT.....

70,000 Monday Night

So we went to Alestorm's show, but the sheer amount of people in there made it almost inmpossible to get pictures, so I'm going to post pictures of Nightwish.  We were late to Nightwish, because this Finnish guy in the casino stopped my husband and decided to talk to him about buying cigarettes in Finland! (It was amusing, I should have just left him there! I'm so mean..) So I was about three people back in the show, and right by the keyboards, (what are the odds? rofl) I was always one of those girls who watched the "End of An Era" DVD (begrudgingly of course, because I couldn't stand Tarja's voice live. MY OPINION, no facts here people.) and watched all those fifteen year old girls cry and just laughed at them..

Like really? Uh huh, you're going to cry? Okay then? It took me all of two minutes into Finlandia and I was bawling my eyes out. I HAVE OFFICIALLY REGRESSED TO A 15 YEAR OLD YEAR OBSESSED FAN GIRL. Awesome!!!1111! See and I don't know, if it was Tuomas and his keyboards of awesome, or Troy Donockley and his fabulous pipes. My grandmother was Scottish, and pipes have always been kind of bitter sweet for me.

Anyways, picture time.



Great concert, even though the equipment was not fucking working most of the time, and yet I didn't hear it not working, at all. That's how you know good musicians, damnit. <3 Also, People were really respectful. And for my first concert, of Nightwish, it was amazing and I ended up a puddly mess. and I ended up holding the green organza bag that held Tuomas's gift through most of it. I'm such a little coward, I know.

70,000 Tons of metal- We're here!

So by the time we got up in the hotel that morning, so many things were running through my head. I had to do my make up, which I hadn't done in years, by the way.. It was quite the eye opening experience for me. And we went to breakfast!

Picture time now!?

These are some shots of me that first morning at breakfast at the hotel, and the airport in the middle of the city.




 Next up, we're in a handivan (with my new headphones, since I bought some) on the way to the port and when we get there Dan's like.. "Where do we go...?" Uh Dan, I think you go towards all the people in band t-shirts.. Jus saying....


So we wait in this line up, for fucking ever.. And then, we're like the first people on the boat, along with this other rad couple. aha, sweet!  We go to have a drink, all the while I'm like "IS THAT NIGHTWISH, HOW ABOUT ALESTORM?" By the way, I totally stashed an uber sexy pirate costume in my suitcase. Hat and all. Teehee!



70,000 TONS OF METAL- Getting there!

Around September, in the car on the way back from Calgary (At stupid oclock, like 3 A.M) Dan shows me this metal cruise and goes. "Bailey, there's a metal cruise.. It's a lot of money, but Nightwish is on.." and I lean over and go, "I'm in!" without even thinking about the implications.

I've never been to a Nightwish concert, I missed them on the Dark Passion Play tour because I was just freshly 17 then and they played at a bar here, the Starlite room, and they sold out super fast. Plus, it was just at that time that I was starting to get into the band members thanks to Daniel, because before that (from 11 onward) I had listening to their music but never EVER knew the band members faces, their instruments, nothings. They could have been wearing bunny suits for all I knew, and I was okay with that.

When Dan told me about the cruise in September, it was around that time I went on Etsy, searching for Jewelery for myself for the cruise (particularly headbands) but I stumbled on something much much more.. breathtaking. I had bought it without a second though thinking that I would wear it. It was a vintage Beauty and The Beast pendant, it's not from Disney, it's much older art than that, but it was beautiful. Two weeks before it came, it dawned on me, it was never meant for me to wear, it was meant for Tuomas Holopainen. This came to me in a dream, and usually, I listen to my dreams when I get such strong feelings. I woke up feeling.. ill, to say the least. For me, talking to people is nerve racking. It scares me, almost to the point of tears, really. I am terrified of it, especially if I have to approach them... Something I was going to have to conqeur on the boat.

Over the next few months we struggled, we saved, we scrimped, we fought about it every which way we turned. It literally would be as bad as "YOU BOUGHT NEW SHOES?! SERIOUSLY THAT could be 5 drinks on the cruise!" But we pulled it off. We saved enough and On Saturday night we left for the airport. Our flight didn't leave until 8 AM Sunday morning, but I wasn't willing to risk handivan taxis, or any extra checking of my chair they would need to do. So we waited in line at the Delta counter for 6 hours lol. THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS ON 24 HOURS NO SLEEP. Bailey and Dan get up to shennanigans!
Finally we get through that line, (because we were first) and we get through security.. Also, I could have been smuggling drugs, a bomb, weapons. "Nah, just let her through.." Uh, okay. This REALLY worries me. lol. I mean, I wasn't. the most I had on me was my hand cream, but it was in the appropriate sized bottle and all that jazz... Also, I wore no metal.. Or heels. Jenna Marbles would have been proud.

So we go to get on our plane, they take my chair and I'm just hoping they don't break it and they make me walk the way to the plane, which is okay, but I'm deathly afraid of heights and planes. Yup. Jumping off and running home is looking like a great option, but Dan's like melded to my arm as I'm breathing deeply.. and I put in my headphones. We de-ice and as we take off I listen to "I Want my Tears Back" and subsequently Imaginaerum by Nightwish about 50 times. Dan's passed out, and he's sick, so he's snoring but I prefer to stay up and stare out the window. For someone scared of planes I'm obsessed with staring out windows, it's very strange. We land in Minneapolis, and do a quick transfer and take off.. About three minutes into the flight.. My very very very awesome Orca headphones die on me!! And there's Dan listening to his music. I give him the evil eye the entire way there as he's listening to his music.

Miami Airport is interesting, isn't it? For those of you who haven't been there.. Well it's a mall, for one.. It has a Starbucks everywhere you turn, (And let's face it, I love frappuchinos so I wasn't complaining) and it's in the middle of the city. I've been awake for like 37 hours straight now.. Eventually we grab some Subway, and go to our room (since it's in the hotel) and watch.. The food Network and I pass out and wake up eight billion times thinking we're late!